By Twist Athing, Our Human Interest Correspondent

HOPE and DYLAN Auchenshoogle were front page news 12 months ago after being born two hours apart, and on different sides of the Scotlandshire - England black hole anomaly on the border.

HOPE, the Scottish twin, is the quiet and serious one, some might even say dour. She has analysed the pros and cons of Independence and sleeps with a YES sticker hanging from her mobile.

Despite being only one year old she is insistent that control over your own affairs is preferable to relying on someone coming to give you what you need after you spent an hour crying for it only for them to do the wrong thing and you're back to square one.

She indicated her displeasure at the shenanigans of ‘Project Fear’ -  the pet name that ‘Better Together’ gave themselves and then tried to blame on nationalists when it went public - by laughing uncontrollably at pictures of Vince Cable then crying at a picture of Alistair Darling and gurgling "scary clown".

She added that she would very much like to gum the microphone boom as it looked interesting.

Her mother doesn’t know what caused the separatist gene to be activated in her daughter but is suspicious that her ecstatic calls of “yes.. yes... yes...” during conception were to blame.

Dylan, her English brother, does a ton of complaining about Hope and makes lots and lots of noise with very little to back it up. But just in case anyone thinks we’re being cheeky, we should add that he’s also a faster developer, who sat up and stood weeks before his sister and is almost ready to start walking.

This is a clear indication of the benefit of the Union, as if he had been pure Scottish and not blessed by being born a Brit he would still be drooling uncontrollably, unable to stand unaided, making no sense and expecting everything handed to him by others – like an evening in the House of Lords.

Dylan, named after Bob Dylan, rocks to "Love and Theft" as its description as being "populated by rogues, con men, outcasts, gamblers, gunfighters and desperados, many of them with nothing to lose, some of them out of their minds, all of them quintessentially" Unionist resonates with his values.

He likes to share Hope's toys and is regularly found playing with her favourite ones before hiding them for 30 years in a top secret vault and denying their existence in the first place. He believes that they benefit by spreading the risk of losing their toys, specifically by ensuring that if a toy must be sacrificed it comes from Hope's collection and not Dylan’s. It is this love of sharing which makes them stronger as a family unit – a FACT dismissed by Hope as twaddle given the theft of her play resources over the year.

Dylan believes the Union should remain intact as without access to Hope's toys he may be forced to risk his own toys in the ‘Underage Nurturing Sandbox Company’ (UNSC) sandpit, where the other kids only let him have the same seat because they like his sister and she holds their ‘Water Moving Devices’ (WMD’s) in case they need to soak another child with them. Even though his sister's life would be far better off, Dylan would really miss playing with the big boys and getting into trouble with them as he would have to go to the little kids' play park instead with the other kids his size.

It seems that, for twins, Dylan and Hope really aren’t all that alike. But then, they are from different countries after all, and if it wasn’t for the Union they would be foreigners to each other, abnormal strangers forced to live in the same home.

Margaret Curran was on hand to give her opinion and noted, “Imagine that... being forced to share your home with a foreigner... I mean it was bad enough when my son went on holiday to Ibiza and was a foreigner for a fortnight... but imagine living with him when he was a foreigner... Oh my, ahm goin dizzy”

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